Have you ever led someone by the
hand and guided him or her to enter through the gates that guard the boundaries
that define the person that you really are?
It seemed then that you were
under a mystic spell that made you reveal yourself so easily to that person,
not worrying a bit about the reality of rejection, and most of all, not
worrying about the reality - and the risk it accompanies - that opening
yourself to him or her is actually exposing your vulnerability - the softest
part of you where he or she can easily
stab with a dagger anytime he or she decides to, and
be sure that hitting that spot will instantly drain all the life that is left
in you.
As for me, I did. I’ve been there.
And it hurt a lot. It hurt too much that I could not even begin
to figuratively describe the pain of betrayal.
I have picked up the pieces from
the experience though.
I have learned not really to
regret but instead, to be cautious the next time I decide to open up to someone. Moreso, I have learned to really choose the right
person to open myself to and reveal the feelings I have deep within. That is the harder part, though. The act of opening up to someone is like
giving that someone a present, a gift.
That present is a part of yourself, a vulnerable part of you that that
someone could break. It could also be like handing that person a gun, and allowing him or her to aim it at your heart, but trusting that person that he will never pull the trigger. I think Spongebob said that.
When one opens up,
it is like giving up a part of yourself to someone. That is why choosing the person to reveal
yourself to is actually the hardest part because, it is easy to give up something, but it
is not easy to find the person worth giving it up for.
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